28 Days is one of the first movies that comes to mind regarding alcohol use disorder, and treatment. It’s a good go-to story that gives a snapshot of how alcohol dependency inserts itself in your day-to-day life, and takes control.
Gwen drinks a lot and comes home late one night with live-in boyfriend Jasper, falling in to bed. Waking up late the next morning Gwen realizes that she is now running late for her sister Lily’s wedding, where she is to be a bridesmaid. First thing she does is to have another drink before getting ready to go. With Jasper in tow they stumble in to a taxi and keep drinking on the way to Lily’s house. When I was drinking I relate to needing a drink first thing in the morning just to get going, and to wanting to continue drinking throughout the day just to maintain momentum.
At the wedding reception, Gwen and Jasper continue to fuel each other’s excessive alcohol consumption, and their erratic behavior is obvious to everyone at the event. Gwen eventually falls over on the dance floor and smashes the wedding cake flat to the floor. In her drunken state she decides she can fix the situation, and steals the bridal limousine in search of a cake shop. Along the way she swerves and misses other cars on the road, before veering through a front yard and smashing through the verandah of a house. As a result, the court orders Gwen in to rehab (or jail) for 28 days.
Gwen knows that she drinks a lot but doesn’t believe it’s a problem, and that if she decides it is an issue that she could stop drinking on her own. For Gwen to make any progress, she has to acknowledge that she has a problem. During her 28 days she develops a bond with staff and other patients that are dealing with their own dependency issues. While mostly dramatic, there is a blend of humor to keep the story moving.
During rehab visits, the ever-enabling Jasper sneaks in both drugs and alcohol for Gwen, continuing his normal way of life and not appreciating the reason Gwen is in rehab. While initially implicit in wanting pills and alcohol, Gwen eventually refuses Jasper’s continued supply. During my drinking days I would always find ways to hide alcohol and have a ready supply in situations where it wasn’t available to purchase, so I recognize myself in Jasper.
Gwen needs to reconcile with her sister, but Lily believes Gwen’s addictions make her difficult, if not impossible, to love. Lily also reveals that Gwen made a speech at the wedding reception that humiliated her and her new husband, yet Gwen has no recollection of that speech. This type of memory loss when drinking excessively was common for me, so I find this scene really relevant and accurate.
The sisters eventually bond and realize that Gwen more closely resembles her larger than life mother, who lived and died as an alcoholic when they were children, and that Lily hasn’t been there for her. This constantly drunk mother character in the movie closely represents my experience of having a drunk for a father, as a child.
Following the 28 days of rehab, Gwen realizes Jasper won’t change and she cannot be with him if she has any chance of remaining sober. This begins to explore the idea that we need to surround ourselves with the right people for success.
Chandelier, by Sia: This song explores the theme of alcoholism and substance abuse through the metaphor of “swinging from a chandelier”.
The song highlights the temporary feeling of release and euphoria that comes with intoxication, but also the subsequent emptiness, pain, and regret that follow and accompany addiction.
The music video for Chandelier features then-11-year-old dancer Maddie Ziegler. Throughout the video, Maddie performs an interpretive dance in a deserted, dirty apartment while spinning, kicking, leaping, crawling, falling, twirling and hiding herself behind window drapes. The music video and lyrics follow.
Party Girl
The song uses the image of a “party girl” to represent someone who turns to alcohol and other substances to numb their feelings and escape reality.
Swinging from a Chandelier
The act of “swinging from a chandelier” is a metaphor for living life to excess, particularly through partying and substance abuse.
Living Like Tomorrow Doesn’t Exist
The lyric “I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn’t exist” can be interpreted as a sign of recklessness and a desperate attempt to escape the pain and reality of the present moment.
Tears are Dying
The lyric “My tears are drying” suggests that the protagonist has been crying and is now trying to suppress her emotions through alcohol and partying.
Feeling the Love
The song uses the phrase “Feeling the love” to describe the bond she feels with her partying friends who also struggle with alcoholism and substance abuse, rather than genuine love.
Help Me, I’m Holding on for Dear Life
This lyric implies that the protagonist is struggling to hold on to her sanity and is desperate for help.
Run From This
The lyric “Run from this” suggests that the protagonist wants to escape her problems and the consequences of her actions.
Official Music Video
Lyrics: Chandelier, by Sia (2014)
Verse 1 Party girls don’t get hurt Can’t feel anythin’, when will I learn? I push it down, I push it down I’m the one for a good time call Phone’s blowin’ up, ringin’ my doorbell I feel the love, I feel the love
Chorus I’m gonna swing from the chandelier From the chandelier I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn’t exist Like it doesn’t exist I’m gonna fly like a bird through the night Feel my tears as they dry I’m gonna swing from the chandelier From the chandelier
Post-Chorus But I’m holdin’ on for dear life Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes Keep my glass full until mornin’ light ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight Help me, I’m holdin’ on for dear life Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes Keep my glass full until mornin’ light ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight, on for tonight See upcoming pop shows Get tickets for your favorite artists
Verse 2 Sun is up, I’m a mess Gotta get out now, gotta run from this Here comes the shame, here comes the shame (Ah)
Chorus I’m gonna swing from the chandelier From the chandelier I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn’t exist Like it doesn’t exist I’m gonna fly like a bird through the night Feel my tears as they dry I’m gonna swing from the chandelier From the chandelier
Post-Chorus But I’m holdin’ on for dear life Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes Keep my glass full until mornin’ light ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight Help me, I’m holdin’ on for dear life Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes Keep my glass full until mornin’ light ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight, on for tonight
Outro On for tonight ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight Oh, I’m just holdin’ on for tonight On for tonight, on for tonight ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight ‘Cause I’m just holdin’ on for tonight Oh, I’m just holdin’ on for tonight On for tonight, on for tonight
The saying one’s too many and 100’s not enough suggests that even a single drink can be problematic for some, and that the need for alcohol can become insatiable, leading to excessive consumption.
The saying is commonly used in addiction circles to illustrate the problematic nature of alcohol consumption and the potential for it to spiral out of control.
One’s Too Many…
This part highlights the idea that even a small amount of alcohol can be a problem for individuals struggling with addiction or alcohol dependence.
… and 100’s Not Enough
This emphasizes the potential for alcohol consumption to escalate to excessive levels, where the need for alcohol becomes overwhelming and never truly satisfied.
After a tough week of withdrawal, loneliness and dwelling on regrets, I am glad to wake up on Thursday and realise that it’s been seven whole days since I have even thought about drinking or even wanting alcohol.
It hasn’t been easy, but it hasn’t been hard either given that all the drama that I caused is very fresh in my mind. I will not ever do that to myself again. Ever. I should be dead.
